in a very honest way but ultimately innocuous way I hope that I didn't link this blog anywhere regrettable and I hope that this can not be seen on Google

 Because! This blog is silly and I am afraid that it links to another blog of mine about model rocketry I did when I was a kid. Like. dang. thatd be silly. and then there are all sorts of other posts on this blog, or just two, "all sorts of" I recognize as a phrase is a cliche that works most like a Hand gesture. And then in this blog there is really bad grammar. This poest does not reflect my abilities as a writer so much as it showcases my abilities as a drafter/typist. The latter, I am incredibly poor at. 

But today I am going to write a little about the videos that I watched tonight and the pain that I feel about having a tough time doing what I need to do w/r/t university. I should be doing that stuff right now instead of this. I am not doing that stuff and it makes me sort of sick. I'm really driven mad by it. but I need a space to process what I consume, even if that takes up a little bit more of my time at first. Hopefully, writing about this stuff will put it out of my mind, so I can be more effiecient and think about my schoolwork with greater focus.

VIDEO ABOUT NARDWUAR

This video was good because it made me think about how good a journalist can be. My impression of Nardwuar, is that he has all of the character of Hunter S Thompson, but he does not let his character impede his job. Also, Nardwuar is not an asshole. I don't rememeber much about this video. Basically NDWR goes and talks to the people around celebrities, to get an interveiw w/ the celeb and get information on the celeb.

NARDWAURS TED TALK

I liked this ted talk a lot. It was really poignant to me because nardwuar spins 'bad' qualities typical of student journalists as things that are good, actually. Namely, not knowing anything and being nervous (the human condition really). He explicitly says that both of these things are good.

• Not knowing anything
• puts you in a position where you *need* to do research on your interveiwee
• research is unambigously good, and helps you in asking good questions
• being nervous
• really lets you know that you *need* to do research. If you are nervous you would naturally prepare.

On this second point I am a little skeptical. Many times (may be tonight) I get so nervous that I get paralyzed sort of. It seems like an ADHD exectuive function type intermingled shit show of feeling. It feels like anxiety but it may not be. Anyhow, nerves are not always productive for me

but the human serviate may reply. "ofc you can't be too nervous, you still have to perform"

which brings me to the next video

PHILOSOPHYTUBE VIDEO ABOUT AUTHENTICITY AND ART

Is Nardwaur being 'authentic'? I think this question is not really all that substantial in the context of nardwuar actually, because the focus of the interveiws is ultimately the interveiwee. He is a journalist, not Hunt Thompson—ayo. I also think that—and I think that my thought is generally felt to be true—that by performing as someone that does not fit the archetype of 'journalist', nardwaur reveals more about the artists he interveiws. We are able to see 'normal' interveiws with celebs, and then we are able to see those same celebs w/ nardwuar. Having the two builds a more full portrait of the celeb.

My thoughts on the philosophytube video itself, and not my riffing on the general concept of authenticity and how it relates to nardwuar:

• need to watch this one again bruv.

yeah thats it. I need to watch it again. full authenticity. shit like. I think my monkey brain always hates the criticsism of 'inauthentic' because it is so complicated and if you call something 'inauthentic' you essentially paint yourself as holding a well though out strong stance on what authentic actually means, and since I don't, I look weaker. I need to study rhetoric to get around that problem lol.

IN CONCLUSION

you can stop reading now I'll stop writing now I'll go read for class I really hope I do alright oh I do I do I do I do.